Things Making Me Think

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Tootsie

Running a blog, you always have to make the decision of which parts of your life to reveal on the internet and which parts to keep to yourself. As someone who is terrible at hiding her emotions and pretty much incapable of lying, I find this especially hard. However, the past couple of weeks I’ve written cheery blog posts because I didn’t want to talk about the thing keeping me up nights.

Our cat passed away this week. That cat I complained never let me sleep, the one who was distinctly ungrateful of the fact that I’d rescued her. The cat who meowed her way loudly into our laps and our hearts. She wasn’t with us very long, but watching her health rapidly decline these past few weeks and then having to deal with the question “when is it time” was one of the hardest things I’ve ever faced. The morning we decided that there was nothing more we could do and it was time to take her in was one of the worst I’ve had. I spent the entire day swallowing back tears at my desk.

Now, a few days later, I feel more at peace. I can sleep through the night, not being constantly woken by the fear that she’s in pain. I know she’s not. I know she’s up in kitty heaven meowing down at us. I know we gave her a loving home for the past six months of her life, and I think she was happy there. So I guess that’s all there is. I’m still sad.

Here are some things helping distract me this week:

Yes, please.

The best movie of the ’90s?

Definitely the best movie of the ’80s.

Incredibly inspiring.

And kind of contradicts the last article, but thank you for this.

Reading: Finally started this! But so far it’s kind of meh. I hope it picks up.

Writing: Play story. 30K words in and trying to figure out how to make my protagonist less whiny.

Watching: Same thing as last week. It has been a wonderful distraction.

Listening to: On a Bruce kick.

Cooking: This is actually amazing.

Have a great weekend. As for me, I will be spending my time trying to not cry because it’s over, but smiling because it happened.

Friday Things

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It’s been a challenging week, to say the least. My new senior kitty is still in the throes of getting used to me, and I am still in the throes of getting used to trying to reason with a creature who doesn’t understand English. “I rescued you!” I exclaim to her. “You’re lucky to have me!” Alas none of my words have the desired effect, which is to get her to stop yowling in the middle of the night and disrupting my sleep. I’m trying some kind of diffuser that releases some kind of calming hormone next; in the meantime, if anyone has any suggestions that could help my situation, I’m more than open to hearing them. I’m getting a little desperate.

Here are some great links from the internets that have at least helped distract me:

1. The secret to enjoying a long winter (I so want to go here!)

2. The best friendship movies (I agree with almost all of these)

3. Has anyone heard of this site? Apparently it helps you find your next favorite movie, music, or book based on what you like. Haven’t used it yet (heard it’s a giant timesuck) but thinking about it!

4. This couple renovated a 1950s Airstream and are living out of it for a year. This is so, so cool, but what I love about this story is the honesty of it:

We felt stuck in draining careers that were sucking the life right out of us, and barely allowing us to make ends meet. We decided that we needed to change something. We left on this journey for a very personal and honest reason. We needed to find home and a life that looked the way we wanted it to, instead of a life that saddened us and didn’t look quite as we’d expected.

#sorelatable

Reading: Currently at the beginning of this, which is wonderfully weird. Also while driving last week I listened to my first audio book, another Maggie Stiefvater. It was just okay, though I’m not totally sure if it was the story or the brand-new audio book experience (or the slightly annoying voice of one of the readers). I’ll probably try audio books again on my next long drive, but I definitely prefer the written word to the spoken one. My mind wanders too much. More on this later.

Watching: Just finished this series! Cried at the finale. I can’t believe I almost didn’t continue watching it. I’m once again reminded that good storytelling is good storytelling, regardless of medium. Now I’ll have to find something new to entertain me during my hours cooking and laundering and cleaning up after my wailing senior kitty. Suggestions welcome!

Listening to: This band. How they escaped my early college Ataris and Co phase I do not know but I’m glad to be listening to them now.

Have a great weekend! Hope you get more sleep than I surely will…

Image not mine, I found it on this Tumblr; my cat is too busy meowing at me to pose for Tumblr-worthy photos